2004-07-03 11:15 p.m.
The Happy Days (is the sarcasm evident)
Happiness is extremely rare these days, well for me anyway, many others seem to be happy all the time. Am now coping with evil hand disease that makes fingers dry and peely, yuckyness indeed, is annoyed by stress apparently.
This is getting old, I can't break these chains that I hold, my body's growing cold, there's nothing left of this mind or my soul, addiction needs a pacifier, the buzz of this poison is taking me higher, this will fall away, this will fall away.
Not actually looking forward to the ball next Thursday, I'm gonna do something extremely stupid and I won't be able to face anyone after, maybe I won't go after all.
How am I supposed to feel about the things I've done, I don't know if I should stay or turn around and run, I know I hurt you things will never be the same, the only love I ever knew I threw it all away.
I really don't know what I'm looking for: life, love, happiness, is that what I want? No, I don't think I want these things, what's the point everything gets taken away in the end, I think I'll carry on drowning wishing everyone else will be fine.
If I could find you now, things would get better, we could leave this town, and run forever...
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